Let’s Try Again!

We leave the chapel, go outside and sit on a bench right outside the front door.  I wonder what the preacher and his assistant are thinking?  I just cannot help this laughing, I am sure it is probably stress and a release.  Who knows? My fiance tries to not make any more jokes so that I can stop laughing but at this point, anything is a joke to me. I am sure that you have had these moments when you have a fit of laughter and anything that is done or said just sets you off. We start discussing/reliving all of the events since we have arrived laughing and carrying on about it. We eventually get all laughed out.  He asks if we can still go get married.  In we go.

There are no questions asked by the preacher or his assistant.  In fact, they hardly even have an expression on their face.  Then again, they have not had any expressions since the beginning except to each other and that is in their adoration to each other.  It somehow feels like the times you would get chastised in school for giggling or causing an outburst.  We did not have to stand in the corner or skip recess or even write sentences, though.

We are back in the chapel in our proper position.  Do you know what?  I do not even remember any of the rest of the ceremony to even talk about.  I just know that we did actually get married and it was probably short and quick.  He did read Corinthians 13:4-8, I remember that. He did not ask my fiance to say “my dearest beloved” and I assure you, that is a good thing! I think that at this point, they were no longer interested in trying to do it properly, as in stand on the exact spot, etc.  I think they wanted us out of there as quickly as we did.  He was uncomfortable, you know.  He did not have on his favorite blue tie!  There was also the gardening to get back to!

Okay!  Now we get to go home!  Yay!!  I decided that I would like to wait to surprise my mother and sister and everyone in person.  So here we go!  Do things get any better?  Of course not!  Will I ever get out of this truck?  It is doubtful. We go through Utah.  My new husband says we will get a hotel there for our honeymoon. Guess what is between California and Utah???  Death Valley is there.  There is a nice short little stretch for 200 miles that there is NOWHERE to stop!  There are signs warning of this all over the place. We have our last bathroom stop.  It never worked when your parents would try to make you go before you leave, I am sure it will not now. Being aware of no place to stop only makes you think of it constantly and I try to tell myself to stop thinking about it.  We are singing and trying to have some fun.

It starts to get really, really hot in the cab.  My husband is messing with the controls and everything but there is no air conditioning.  I do not get it, there must be something about no air conditioning with us.   There is nothing worse than being hot and it does not do much for your mood. This is Death Valley, you know.  If it is 100 degrees outside, it is probably 120 in the cab of the truck.  There is no alternative but to open the windows. Now we get to go down the highway with the noise of a semi, turbo and all, and the wind blowing through the truck.  Boy, I sure would hate to be a truck driver for a living!  How do these guys do it with all of these problems? I guess I must be a bit spoiled after all. My husband’s analogy was that it was like someone holding a hair dryer on high right in your face.  I say it was 10 hair dryers!  This was so miserable.  The only difference is no one was telling me to be quiet and go to sleep, but believe me, I was not giggling this time as when the hotel air conditioning was not working when I met his parents.

Well, I finally really had to go to the bathroom, so that was uncomfortable.  Miraculously a reservation/rest area appeared!  They were selling jewelry and trinkets, lots of turqouise.  They had bathrooms, boy was I excited, but not for long.  These bathrooms were metal teepees. The inside was a spiral walk through, like what the inside of a snail would look like. I started winding through and then came right back out.  It was dark and very hot.  There was no way I was walking through something I could not see in.  What if it were just a hole to lean over and I fell in.  I am such a sissy!  Back to the furnace of the truck and on our way.  Heat gets the best of me every time.  My husband suggests that I open the curtains and lay in the bunk. I tried that but it was no better and I said, “I want a divorce!”  Haha. (That happens to be the one and only time I have said that to him.  Probably because we have had air conditioning ever since.) Just a few short hours and the honeymoon is over.  He was ever so patient, but not me.

I believe we stayed in Provo, Utah.  This was not a good experience either.  We checked in, we ARE husband and wife, but no one there seemed to think we were.  They were all staring with looks of disgust on their faces.  I am sure they just knew I was someone this truck driver picked up for the night.  They went through all sorts of things just to register us, they had a million questions.  I do not know if this was because it was Utah or what, but they put us through the wringer.  I even finally volunteered that we were just married that morning.  They did not say a word or bat an eye, just looked at me like, yeah right, sure you did.  Well this put a big damper on my spirits. Their treatment was disrespectful.   My husband gave me all sorts of reasons they could be acting like this and tried to cheer me up.  Finally, I realized…this man IS my husband and who really cares what they think.  Just get through this and tomorrow I will be back home!

NOT!!!  He had another run added on.  We were going to stop in Denver.  I really want to tell my family that we are married. All of a sudden, it dawns on me that I only met his parents that one time.  What did I really know about any of them?   They live about 45 minutes from my home town.  I realized, what if my husband was like the town trouble maker or a hated family in their town?  How would I like that?  I start asking him these questions.  I asked what if he were the town drunk or in trouble with the law.  He said no that is my grandpa.  He said, but I am the town bigamist.  So funny, this guy!  Fine time to ask now, but he just laughed and told me all about his family and I had nothing to worry about. Funny, he never asked me any questions.

Nothing much happened after this other than more delays. We had to spend an extra two nights waiting for the place to open. He was suppose to be able to drop at any time, but for some reason, this was changed. I was so anxious to get home and tell everyone. I finally had to at least tell my sister. We called and told her and she promised to keep the secret.  Since we got married alone, I needed for someone to be excited for us and my sister was.  We did run into a fellow that worked with him and he was happy for us!

I think that by the time we finally did get home to tell everyone, it was about 10:30 p.m. or so.  I was disappointed knowing that all of my family was probably asleep by now. I had him lay on the air horn anyway!  I love those horns!  My disappointment did not last long, though!  My sister and her son had a cake made for us and came immediately over to mom’s house with the cake and gifts. How sweet!!!! That made everything perfect to me! My mother did not believe us when we told her.  How we told her was to have him “carry me over the threshold”. That backfired. She jumped up and asked what happened to me, did I get hurt?  Haha. When my sister came over, it helped her to perhaps maybe think we were telling the truth.  We showed her our “cute” little wedding certificate that we got from the chapel.  She said anyone could make up a fake one of those!  We told her that the official certificate from the courthouse would take a few days to arrive in the mail and she was somewhat satisfied.  My mom had a really nice reception for us about a week or so later and his sister had one for us in his hometown.  We are now ready to begin our life together.

After knowing each other for three weeks, we are still married almost 30 years later and still making each other laugh.  I am sure we will have a lot more adventures/embarrassing moments/memories and get into a lot more “trouble”.